time is passing and life still does not change and not matter how hard i try, nothing makes me happy. work is awful, the people suck and my surroundings are more than stressful. i can’t seem to find a moment of joy and when i pretend, i feel as though i am cheating at this reality i so project to others.
why do we put ourselves through the horror?
we do this because we are expected too and i am here to tell you, no more. the people i interact with drive me nuts, my personal life has no happiness either and most of you will see, therapy when in fact that is the least thing i need.
what i truly need is something really great to happen in order to satisfy my deserving. the need is greater than the situation and i can’t find it. honestly, i just don’t care. i do what i have to and that’s it. i am about to quit a job because they are making me do things i am not comfortable with and people are saying: “give it a chance” – well, people, i have. for one year now i have been doing this and it still hasn’t changed.
how more does a person have to endure?
something has to give, honestly, my life can’t always be at the bottom but it seems so.
