Maybe I Like That I’m Not Alright

True to form, I have come to realize that even though I am all fucked up in my own way, life will not change for me. Therefore, I have to adapt to my own truths and live with my own decisions in the making.

How often do you feel as though you a victim of defeat? Pretty often, I am sure and with the experiences I have had, people aren’t always kind and can make us feel less important. Some would say, we allow them to make us feel like this but then again, how much shit can you handle in one lifetime?

As I am trying to find my own happiness again, being at the lowest I have even been in the last 30 years, I am focused on simpler things. Like for instance, riding my new bike. I love it, it is a freedom I have not experienced in a long time and I am happy to say, it is helping my physical appearance as well. Some of the latest identifiers I have noticed is feeling sick. Anxiety isn’t without a sense of humour; our bodies will tell us when something is wrong or unhealthy. Of course I do realize I am getting older and the body breaks down eventually.

In the present moment:

Recently, I have made some other changes professionally, being on sick leave makes you think about where you want to be and what type of work you want to do. I have tried many times to fit in with different companies and it has been hard to find the right one. Many interviews later, I still haven’t found the perfect fit or at least something I really like. Companies are really picky in 2025 and as brutal as that is I am concerned. We all need money right? But I also want to work for a company that will accept versatility and humanity. I want to like what I am doing and not feel stressed out.

I always appreciate my readers; being here means you have something to express. As I continue on my journey of creating and identifying my needs, feel free to reach out!