reposted by the author – of 13 chaos – ebook 13 chaos when you stop you lose
When faced in a situation in love, deep profound lost, and a sense of being a no one hits you, how do you survive? With me, it started as a journal and now is become one of my best past times ever. I know many people have had broken hearts, but when it hits you so hard that you can no longer function, you start wonder is it all worth it.
I fell deeply in love for the first time in my life at age 40 and it was the best experience you could ever imagine. I thought when you fall in love it is forever, but to my surprise it didn’t last. What I can tell you that what I took with me is a sense of hope, feelings of being powerful in any situation and the ability to speak my mind.
Get izii expressions right in your inbox
Join me on this journey of unconditional journey for free to get updates from this writer.
What this all means to me? I can go on even though I feel anxious and stressed out at times over my break up. I can still love him and know I had the time I had with him. Maybe someday he will return in my life and when he does, I will be a better person for it.
( fyi update on this ) the hardship of breakup or loss leaves us with all the imaginary thoughts possible. we think the worse, try to analyze all the scenarios and think for most of it:
“what did I do so wrong”
self love is hard enough without being consumed with other people’s feelings and thoughts. try to face the hurt, the pain, the sorrow and know that in that moment, it is a sign you are human.
13 chaos
introduction
I wrote most of these blogs in 2010 when I first started writing. I was very hurt and in pain over a love relationship, but I have grown through this struggle. I always felt victimized by defeat, lies, and negative thoughts and shared all this on my site.
Over the last fifteen years, I have struggled with more defeats than I care to admit. Getting older has not made me smarter or stronger. Attempting this thing called life never got easier, although I was blind to think it.
What I do know for sure is the lessons. We learn by experience, and I have had quite a few of those. I still try to write, although my thoughts are so confused these days; I really can’t keep it together. Professionally, I have failed in every way possible and lost a most precious part of my life, my firstborn son. His drug addiction took the best of him, and now in 2025, I have an emptiness that can never be filled.
I also lost my greatest hero that same year, my dad. His passing was a shock. He was my rock, my guide the one that I was always trying to prove myself to.
The one thing that is constant, after revising this book and reading it again, I realized, life really hasn’t changed. I am not where I want to be and I am certainly not proud of who I have become.
want to read / buy this .pdf version? contact me.
About izii
Hi, I am the Creator of Izii's Blog
but in the real world, I am Cathy. A mom, survivor and legendary bold, authentic woman that believes in reality and isn't shy to share it. I love to express my thoughts and feelings in order to better understand my mental health and why releasing them is so important.